Archive for September, 2005
Reporting of the Petrol Problems
The following is a slightly paraphrased version of two BBC News sessions:
BBC: We have the leader of the protesters here in the studio: Tell me, how effective do you think this blockade is going to be in curbing fuel prices?
Protester: No, you’ve misunderstood us. We’re not blockading anyone. We’re just protesting the high prices that citizens of this country have to endure.
BBC: Yes of course. But it could be said that the petrol blockades of a few years ago did little to effect the price of fuel, what would you say to those who criticise your use of a similar strategy?
Protester: What? We’re not. This is not a blockade.
BBC: Yes, well that may be, but do you think that this blockade might create further confusion in relation to petrol than already exists?
Protester: What blockade? We’re not having a blockade. Stop mentioning blockades!
BBC: Sorry, we’ll have to cut you off there. Remember: Send your experiences of the Petrol Blockade to…
One week later…
BBC: …and in other news, the much hyped petrol blockades failed to take place this week, many are wondering just what went wrong.
If only I were joking.
Stolen from MacHall
Representatives of varying credibility from the world’s three major Abramic religions weigh in on what caused the hurricane: Christianity. Islam. Judaism. (Spoiler: The answers are “queers,” “Iraq” and “the Gaza pullout,” respectively.)
I swear I am not making this up
It is 2021, tomorrow is the 20th anniversary of 9/11.
America is under oppression by ultra-liberal extremists which have yielded
governing authority to the United Nations. It is up to an underground
conservative group (known as F.O.I.L.) led by Sean Hannity, G. Gordon Liddy and
Oliver North to thwart Ambassador Usama Bin Laden’s plans to nuke New York
City.
If there’s a better use for WTF?!? I’ve yet to find it.
